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Depression is certainly nothing new to me, I have been letting it pass me by since I was 4 or 5 up till the point I am at now. (19). What still bothers me is that I do not understand what to expect from it, and anytime I had seen a therapist I was left with eyebrows raised and questionaires being passed on to superiors, etc. None of the various psychiatric teams that have been assigned to me in various institutions and situations ever felt the need to let me in on the big secret that was my "treatment." I have been on medications (the whole pharmacopia) and have had different therapies. I just feel like I have been left in the dark about my own mental hygiene. As of yet no one has bothered to tell me what I can expect from it all, or why some days I can be in my sleep all day not shower for a week mode and others I feel on top of the world and dare someone to take me down. I feel that way tonight, energized and anxious. I just want to be able to make sense of my life, to be able to unravel everything that is going on around me. I hate having a weakness of any kind, and depression is certainly one that controls my life on a daily basis. If anyone can help me sort through some of this stuff it would be appreciated. Thanks for your time. (I hope I left this in the right section.)

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